New Year, New YOU!
The new year is a time for setting intentions and creating the change we want to see in ourselves and our lives . Many view it as a fresh start. Everywhere, you see the headline “New Year, New You!” I have to say- I hate this phrase. “New You” implies your current you is no longer valuable and is not worth saving. You get a new version of something when your current version is worn out, obsolete, or broken.
While we may all feel this way sometimes (I feel you, tired parents out there.) Discarding your “old self” for a new one also means you discard all of the hard fought lessons and experiences that have shaped you along the way. While you may not see the value in some of these experiences, they are what make you the uniquely wonderful you that you are.
I’m not saying we shouldn’t work on ourselves. Of course we should always be willing to grow and change, but we need to be intentional with the actions or changes we make and examine how they will improve the lives of ourselves and/or those around us. I think an important question to ask ourselves is, “and then what?” How will achieving this goal make my life better?
We should always be willing to grow and change, but we need to be intentional with the actions or changes we make.
What is the True Goal of Your Resolution?
A common goal in the new year is weight loss. I’m not saying it’s not a valid resolution, but we need to examine why we want to lose weight. Is it for our health? To attract a partner? To fit into our favourite old jeans or outfit? Ask yourself, “and then what?” If you achieve your goal, how will it affect your life positively? Then what will happen? What other changes may occur because of this? Is this the best way to achieve your true goal or is there another way this can be accomplished?
I think we all fall into the trap of “happy when” occasionally, thinking if we could just achieve that one thing, everything would be great. Often we don’t examine how it will actually make us happy. We have to be conscious of what we are wishing for and how it will impact our lives.
Wish Fulfilling Tree
In my kid’s yoga teacher training, we learned the story of the Wish Fulfilling Tree to teach kids how we manifest both our wishes and our fears in our lives.
The story tells of a farmer walking to market on a hot day with the sun blazing down on him. He comes across a tree along the road and sits under it to rest.
He thinks about how nice it feels to rest in the shade and says, “if I only had a glass of water, this would be perfect.” Lo and behold, a tall glass of ice cold water appears before him. He was sitting under the Wish Fulfilling Tree.
As he continued to sit there he got hungry and thought, “some food would be nice.” A beautiful banquet, the like of which he had never seen, appeared before him.
That led him to think, “If only I had someone to share this with,” and a beautiful wife appeared before him.
His wishes led to greater wishes and soon he had a large, productive farm with plenty of children to help. He had everything he wanted. As he sat there admiring his beautiful family and the life he had created he started to get worried.
“I have all of these wonderful things, what if I tiger were to come out of the jungle and eat me?”
That is exactly what happened.
The man had never left the shade of the Wish Fulfilling Tree.
This story helps illustrate to kids in a simple way the power of thought patterns in our lives. A fear or worry is just a wish that we don’t want to come true. We often spend time thinking about what we want and how to achieve it, without examining how our fears may be holding us back or sabotaging our efforts.
If you’re interested in introducing your kids to yoga and mindfulness, check out our classes here.
Is Negative Thinking Sabotaging You?
We can probably all recall a time when we didn’t do something we wanted, not because we were scared physically, but emotionally. Worried about the embarrassment of failing, what others may think of us, overwhelmed by the work required to achieve our goal, and so we don’t even begin.
While we might not have to worry about something quite so dramatic as a tiger coming out of the jungle to eat us, our negative thoughts become self-fulfilling prophecies, and we end up missing out on opportunities and experiences because of our fears.
It can be difficult to change these thought patterns. When you notice yourself thinking something negative or your anxieties and fears creeping in, take a breath, and visualize yourself achieving your goal.
Think about the things you have achieved in the past, whether large or small. Think of the challenges you have already overcome that have helped you grow into a stronger wiser person.
Create a positive mantra for yourself that you can repeat when your are facing a difficult time or need extra motivation. Write it on your mirror, write it on your forehead – write it on your kids’ foreheads! Whatever you gotta do to break that habit of negative thinking!
Our words and thoughts are powerful and we need to treat them as such. We all know how the words of others can affect our confidence and self image. We need to acknowledge that our own words and self talk hold even more power over us.
So instead of a New Year, New You – how about New Year, More Intentional You? Instead of placing all your life’s happiness on one resolution (no pressure right??) Take it one day, one step, one breath at a time.
Take a Deeeeep Breath
Each day focus on one thing that makes you happy, even if its just that morning coffee you are clinging to for dear life. Add one manageable positive thing to your life at a time. If something doesn’t work out the way you planned or hoped, take a deep breath and move on. It’s creating space in your life for something you need more.
One breath is all you need for it to be in the past. One breath is all you need for your future to become your present. So take a breath, and then another. Just keep breathing, trust in the universe, trust in yourself, and let those positive intentions cultivate the life you envision.
Stay Salty Friends!
Meghan
May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.
Nelson Mandela